Portland Perplexed: City Officials Baffled by Sudden Disappearance of All Traffic Cones

Portland Perplexed: City Officials Baffled by Sudden Disappearance of All Traffic ConesPortland Perplexed: City Officials Baffled by Sudden Disappearance of All Traffic Cones Portland, Oregon has been thrown into disarray after the inexplicable disappearance of every single traffic cone within city limits. Officials are at their wit’s end, baffled by the peculiar incident that has left roads chaotic and drivers bewildered. Since dawn, countless traffic cones, once ubiquitous in construction zones, intersections, and road closures, have simply vanished without a trace. City workers, police officers, and even private contractors have been left scratching their heads, unable to locate a single cone anywhere. “It’s as if an invisible force has swept through the city and taken them all,” exclaimed Mayor Ted Wheeler. “We have no idea what could have caused this.” The absence of traffic cones has created a hazardous situation on Portland’s roads. Without proper direction and warnings, drivers are struggling to navigate intersections, leading to increased confusion and potential accidents. “I got lost for an hour trying to find my way out of downtown,” said one frustrated commuter. “There were no cones to tell me where to go.” City engineers have been working tirelessly to erect temporary traffic controls, but the task is proving daunting as the scarcity of cones continues. Road closures have also been extended due to the lack of clear direction, further disrupting traffic flow. Police have launched an investigation into the disappearance, but so far, no leads or suspects have emerged. Some residents have speculated about extraterrestrial involvement, while others have dismissed it as an elaborate prank. “We’re taking this very seriously,” said Police Chief Danielle Outlaw. “We’ll leave no stone unturned until we find those responsible.” Meanwhile, Portland officials have appealed to the public for any information that could shed light on the perplexing case. A reward has been offered for anyone who can provide a substantial lead that leads to the recovery of the missing cones. As the city grapples with this unprecedented situation, residents and officials alike are left wondering: where did all the traffic cones go? And more importantly, when will they return?